HUGH’S    DIARY

March 1 - Tuesday

MALPAS – PROVINCIAL COUNCIL – FINANCIAL STATEMENTS

Most of this week I’m at Malpas for a meeting of the Sacred Heart Fathers.  I have just been appointed to be a member of our Provincial Council.  Our worldwide community in almost 40 countries is divided into Provinces which are made up of one or several countries.  Ours is the British-Irish Province.  Fr Michael Walshe is the Provincial Superior which means he has the duty of overseeing our work and communities.  (He is appointed for three years at a time).  He has four advisors.  The other three are Bobby Mann, who is the parish priest in Ardlea Rd, Dublin, Chris Jenkins who is the Director here at Malpas in Cheshire, and John Kelly who is the Novice Master at Inchicore Rd, Dublin.

Before starting Project 2030 I had been Provincial for 9 years.  People here asked me if it is strange being back on the Council.  The big difference is that now I only have to give my advice and sometimes vote on major issues.  At the end of the meeting I can go away and forget about it  Previously I had all the responsibility and had to carry out the decisions.  One of our American priests asked me a while back whether I was too young when I was appointed as Provincial at 38.  My answer was that I was not too young the first three years, but I was too young the second three years.

Last night we had a meeting with the previous Council.  Two members were stepping down – Michael Hughes who is the Superior and Parish Priest in my community in Stockport, and Jim Matthews who was the Director at Dehon House and often welcomed the group there.  One of our duties is to examine the financial reports from our communities and projects.  The Project 2030 accounts are done by Clare and Celia who work here at Malpas and also do a lot to co-ordinate our groups.  I only brought the bank statements down to them yesterday, which meant that our accounts were not ready to be scrutinised by the Council.  Our Bursar/Treasurer is Pat Harnett, Director of the Stella Maris in Bootle.  He kindly did not mention that my statement had not been finished yet.  Nobody else seemed to notice it was missing.  Don’t tell anyone.

March 2 – Wednesday

WAYS OF REDUCING YOUR STRESS DRIVER

All of us can feel the effects of stress sometime.  The following advice sheet was brought to my notice recently.  There are various things that can drive us to stress, e.g. the need to be perfect, to please, to try hard, to be strong, and to hurry up.  We all need ways of coping with stress.  Let’s know your way and whether this advice has proved helpful.

BE PERFECT

PLEASE

TRY HARD

BE STRONG

HURRY UP

March 3 – Thursday

A REFLECTION ON SUNDAY’S GOSPEL

Someone, listening to Sunday’s Gospel about the woman at the well, thought to send in this reflection which they were given by the Missionaries of Charity of Mother Teresa.  It reminded him of the welling up of the water and the Spirit that the Samaritan woman felt and the thirst she then had for Jesus.

"Behold I stand at the door and Knock"...(Rev. 3:20)

I want you to know that whenever you invite me, I come - always, I have received from the Father ("As much as the Father has loved me, I have loved you..." (Jn 15:10). I come - longing to console you and give you strength, to lift you up and bind all your wounds. I come with my power, that I might carry you and all your burdens, with my grace, to touch your heart and transform your life, and my peace I give to still your soul.

I know you through and through - I know everything about you. Nothing in your life is unimportant to me. I have followed you through the years, and I have always loved you. I love you, for the beauty and dignity my Father gave you by greeting you in his image. I know what is in your heart, I know especially your need for love and how you are thirsting to be loved and cherished. "Come to me all you who thirst" (Jn 7:37). I will satisfy you and fill you. I thirst for you - I thirst to love you and to be loved by you - that is how precious you are to me. I thirst for you. My longing is to bless you and live my life in you. I thirst for you. Open to me, come to me, thirst for me, give me your life - and I will prove to you how important you are to my heart. Ask me every day to enter and take charge of your life - and I will. I thirst for you, just as you are. I stand at the door of your heart and knock - open to me, for I thirst for you.

March 4 - Friday

SOMETHING FOR COUPLES - DEHONIAN SPIRITUALITY

Most responses to the diary are brief, a sentence here or there in a longer email or when we meet.  Comments are always welcome.  The following is a longer letter from someone who has recently got engaged to a non-Catholic who is supportive:

"I always enjoy reading your online diary, and I was particularly interested to read about the recent weekend in Malpas.  I wanted to drop you a line as one of your conclusions from the weekend "maybe something could be done for married people" really struck a chord with me.

I am aged 31, and I feel a real affinity with the Project 2030 group and its aims even though, due to my work and other commitments, I have not been able to attend many events recently and this is unlikely to change in the near future now that I'll be heavily involved in making plans for a wedding ...!

Although I am involved in my parish life, unfortunately there are not that many people close to my age in my parish, and I therefore really value reading your diary and hearing about other people in the UK near to me in age with a Catholic faith that is important to them that they are trying to follow in the midst of our hectic materialistic world today.

So the reason for this e-mail is please do keep me informed of anything that it transpires that Project 2030 could do for married people.  I am also interested in the idea that is mentioned in your diary re. lay people trying to find ways to incorporate Dehonian spirituality into their lives.

I look forward to continuing to follow the progress of Project 2030 by reading your online diary."

When people get married we see less of them, but it looks as though we'll need to try something for couples, even though there are not that many of them and they are spread widely within the group.  I'm sending them an email looking for suggestions.

March 5 - Saturday

LONDON 20S RETREAT AT TURVEY ABBEY

There are not many religious establishments where monks and sisters share the same plant.  Turvey Abbey, where we are having the London 20s Lenten retreat, has male and female Benedictine communities who have the same chapel and pray together.  We arrived last night by bus or train from Bedford.  We had filled all the eleven places available in the Monks' guest house, but there were a few call offs.  A bigger group of 30s will be here in a couple of weeks time.  We've been able to get extra rooms in the convent.  The Sisters are in the main house, the Monks are in the stables and we are in the barn.  Michael, who organised the weekend, had told us not to expect too much, so we are pleasantly surprised with the set-up.  The big plus is that we have the guest house to ourselves.  At meal times it's great to be able to sit around the table chatting as long as we like.  The Brothers provided breakfast things and evening meal, with enough left over for lunch.

The Prayers of the Church are sung five times a day.  Michael and I who are staying in the monastery manage up for the Office of Readings at 6.10 am.  Not that we had much option with a cockerel giving full vent at our end from 4.00 in the morning.  It hasn't dawned on him that the security light is not the sun, methinks.  Yet in general what people appreciate most is the peace here and most get a better than usual sleep.  After breakfast Bro Tom takes us on the tour.  The Abbey is famous for its art work.  One of the Sisters can spend up to 6 months on a hand-made banner.  They also do drapes and vestments.

The middle of the morning provides an opportunity for a time of silence.  In the Gospel there were so many people crowding around that Jesus and the apostles didn't have any time to eat or sleep, so he took them across to the other side of the lake where they could be by themselves and rest.  A retreat is an invitation to spend some time with Jesus.  The thought of nearly an hour of quiet time alone can be a bit daunting, but at the end of the day this proves to have been the most popular and fruitful time.  Before lunch we celebrate the Mass of Ash Wednesday as a group.  Most people go for a walk in the afternoon and some attend the Evening Prayer at 4.00.  At 5.00 Brother Tom gives us a talk on the life of the monastery and how he ended up as a monk, having taken his Final Vows just last year in his early thirties, even though he did not grow up as a Catholic.  He comes from Stockport and attended the local Catholic 6th Form College that is so popular with non-Catholics that parents camp out overnight to get the last remaining places for their children.  He asked to come to Turvey on work experience, and the rest is spirituality.  He explained their vows of obedience, stability (staying in one monastery) and conversion of life.  Poverty and chastity are 'presumed', as are a spirit of prayer, silence and work.

After evening meal we do a review of the day with Night Prayer.  At all our services and discussions we have been lighting our individual candles on the table in the middle.  Some walk down to the village pub, while others head for an early night and the hope that the 'sun' does not rise too early.  Come back, St Peter, all is forgiven. 

March 6 - Sunday

TURVEY ABBEY RETREAT CONTINUED - WHO IS LES?  

First Prayers are mercifully at 7.10 on a Sunday.  An hour's lie-in.  How decadent.  Though the rooster's had a booster and the crowing keeps on growing, in general it was a quiet start to the day.  People help themselves to breakfast and we go to Mass with the community at 10.15.  There are quite a few visitors at Mass and they pile in to our base for tea.  People enjoy the chance to chat.  At 11.45 we gather for our final session which is mainly tying up loose ends and being sent out for a last period of silence to prepare for re-entry to home and work, etc.

When Jesus crossed the lake to give the apostles some peace the crowds guessed where they were going and rushed round by land, so that when they got off the boat the people were waiting for them.  I'd have got back in the boat, but Jesus proceeded to teach and heal again.  At the end of a retreat when we've had that quiet time with Jesus on the boat we discover that we have to face going back to our usual situation and the same people.  Hopefully we are better off, but there is always the possibility that when we get back home we feel worse for a while, a bit like the first couple of days back at work after a holiday.  But, as time goes on, we feel the benefit.  It's good as well to make some resolutions, or be aware of the kind of decisions or conclusions we've been reaching while we've been away.  But don't ask too much of ourselves at the one time.  God calls us forward step by step.  Last night our final reading was the call of Samuel in 1 Samuel, Chapter 3.  As a young boy, while he is helping in the Temple, he hears God calling him in the night, but he does not recognise him at first.  The third time he responds: "Speak, Lord, your servant is listening".  This was a key moment for the Jewish religion when the Ark of the Covenant had almost been forgotten up in the hills.  Samuel became the prophet who anointed King Saul and King David.  Read all about it in your Bible.  We ended up with this reading at the last minute when someone suggested the hymn "Here I am Lord" with the line "I have heard you calling in the night".

We had intended going down to the village for a pub lunch, but we discovered last night that it was fully booked for Mothers Day.  The Brothers turned up trumps again with some food that had been left over last night plus a few M and S cottage pies.  As always there was plenty of ice-cream, and we proved the theory that soup tastes better on the third day.  We collected a good tip for all the extra we'd received.  We'd like to come back.  The Brothers were pleased to have us.  It's not that often they have younger Catholic groups.  Anyone is welcome to go any time.  The address is Christ Our Saviour Monastery, Turvey, Bedford, MK43 8DH.  It's also possible to stay with the Sisters by writing to The Abbey.  (We certainly had a good experience at Turvey, though I still can't work out who Topsy is.  A bit like the guy who enjoyed Les Miserables, except he couldn't work out who Les was.)

Angela is going to write a report on the weekend for the London 20s which we'll also post in the diary.  When I discovered that Jenny was not long back from 3 years teaching in the Holy Land and full of enthusiasm for us to go out there on a visit, I asked her to write her ideas for the diary.  Now a school chaplain, she qualified as a PE teacher, so she wants to make it an adventure holiday as well, though we might leave out the hang-gliding.

There are not many buses on a Sunday, so we caught a taxi minibus into Bedford.  It's only 45 minutes into London, though it took me four and a half hours to get back to Stockport.   Bro Tom told me that Bonnie Prince Charlie crossed the Mersey here in 1745 on his failed march to London to claim the throne.  Must make a pilgrimage to the spot tomorrow.

March 7 - Monday

QUESTIONNAIRES - REVIEW OF DIARY - 299 HITS

One of my many weaknesses is questionnaires.  There can't be many people who walk down the High Street thinking "Question me" when they see someone with a clipboard.  How is it you mostly get stopped when you are in a hurry.  A few years ago there was a spate of people stopping you to support their charity.  In the end I saved them time and energy by telling them right away that I worked for a charity.  They soon let you go.

At the end of the month this web diary will have been going for a year.  I was thinking of sending round a questionnaire to help assess what works and what doesn't work.  How can we improve the diary?  Things have changed a bit, depending on the feedback.  But only a minority say what they really think.  What do others feel?  What about those who have only looked at it once?  Some things aren't so easy to change.  I am who I am.  The group is what it is.  The readers are who they are.

Not that questionnaires work very well in the group generally.  We have tried a few over the years.  The response is never very great, though the answers are usually fairly consistent across the groups.  People often suggest questionnaires to see why people on the mailing list don't come to things, or why people come once and don't come back again.  But if you have not got involved in the group you are less likely to take the time to answer questions.  And I suspect that for some the decision not to answer is a further nail in the coffin of their potential membership.  They feel less able to come along in case we might say: "You're the one who didn't fill in the questionnaire".

Shall we have a review of the diary then?  That depends on the feedback to today's diary.  If you think there are questions we could ask about the log then send them in.  Or are there any comments you would like to make which might get a reaction from others.  Let's have them.  What would you change in the diary, leave out, add?  What are the bits you enjoy most?  What things would you never read?  Why do people read it?  Why do others not come back?  Your comments could be based on your own thoughts, or what you've heard from others.  If there is enough feedback we could make a questionnaire out of it.

In February we had 299 hits, creeping up gradually.  37% of those were first time visitors.  20 also receive the diary each week by email.  But who are our readers?  I know some of you because you make comments or send in emails.  Who are the others?  Are the majority regular attenders at events or are there many who get what they are looking for from just reading the diary.  We'll never know unless we do a questionnaire, and yet it depends who answers the questionnaire.  If 5 people don't respond to this entry then we'd be lucky to get 20 to respond to a questionnaire.  Let's know what you think.

March 8 - Tuesday

WEB DISCUSSION ON CATHOLICS AND THE HEAD OF STATE

Another of my weaknesses that I confessed to last month was going on to message boards and starting discussions.  That's if you can call doing something twice a weakness.  In January I got some reaction on the BBC Radio 5 web forum on the Jerry Springer Opera (see 8 January).  Then last month I started a debate on human cloning (see 8-9 February).  I decided then that I would keep my forays into talk pages to once a month.  Today was the first chance to do anything in March.  Last week I was quite energised by the prospect, but decided to wait and see what were the issues that were in the news today rather than start a debate from nothing.  In the end the topic I chose did not stir up very much fur.  Maybe I should just have gone ahead with my "Five (or ten) things I would change about football".  Another day.

I'm not listening to the radio as much in the morning and I didn't pick up any ethical or religious issues there.  Reading the Guardian at breakfast I saw the heading: "BBC Chief defends screening of Jerry Springer Musical".  At least he admitted: "In my view we have plenty more to do to reflect positively on our airwaves, particularly Christianity where, despite some real advance in recent years, there is still something of a creative deficit".  In the Guardian Supplement (G2) there were three features that were particularly gross or offensive .  Later in the day I heard that the United Nations had voted condemning human cloning.  Britain, of course, was for it.  The topic I chose came from the Guardian home news where it gave good coverage to a Bill that was being introduced to the UK Parliament today.

Here is what I wrote on the BBC Radio 4 site.  The rules of the message board mean that I cannot publish what others have written.  There were 17 different postings of which I contributed 4.  I didn't reply to everything.

Catholic can't marry Head of State Hugh 2030 - 1st post - 8 Mar 2005 16:47
Edward Leigh is introducing a bill into Parliament today to enable the UK Head of State to marry a Catholic. There is a 300 year law which says that prevents heirs to the throne marrying 'Papists'. They can marry anyone else. Surely today this is a form of discrimination that must be unparalleled in a modern democracy. Edward Leigh is making his 10-minute rule bill as simple as possible to give it some chance of success, though snowflakes in hell come to mind. Have the BBC even mentioned this Bill today? More to the point, why can't Catholics become Head of State in this country. What would our reaction be if we discovered that Spain or Italy had a law that excluded Protestants or Jews or atheists from the highest positions in the land. [reply]    [Complain about this post]

re: Catholic can't marry Head of State Hugh 2030 - 2nd post - 8 Mar 2005 17:13
Hugh 2030. My own take on this is that the established Church of England began with a King, a divorce and a remarriage, and that is how it is likely to end, soon. [reply]    [Complain about this post]
 

re: Catholic can't marry Head of State Hugh 2030 - 3rd post - 8 Mar 2005 17:21
Hugh 2030. In the 1970s it was rumoured that Charles was looking for a Princess to marry, but most of the eligible ones in Europe were Catholic. The law would likely be changed quickly if William wanted to marry a Catholic, but if so why wait till then. What does it say to Catholic citizens? That they are somehow 'outlaws' in their own country. As for 'Fidei Defensor', maybe that is why Charles wants to be 'Defender of Faith' as opposed to 'Defender of the Faith'. [reply]    [Complain about this post]
 

re: Catholic can't marry Head of State Hugh 2030 - 4th post - 8 Mar 2005 17:25
Hugh 2030. The Catholic Church use to insist that children should be brought up as Catholcs. Now the Catholic has to promise to do their best to bring any children up as Catholics and the non-Catholic partner has to be informed of this [reply]    [Complain about this post]

March 9 - Wednesday

MORE FROM THE MESSAGE BOARDS - BBC RADIO 5

On Tuesday I tried to open a discussion in the Guardian web page on the same theme of discrimination against Catholics re. the British Royal Family, but I couldn't register properly.  Interestingly enough there was a letter in today's paper about yesterday's gross cartoons.  It read: "You almost succeeded in shocking a fully paid-up Guardian PC Pinko".  I got a good debate going on the BBC Religions page, but they seem to have wiped that out.  Must have been a naughty boy.  The following is the similar discussion that developed on the BBC Radio 5 site.  Again, I can only give what I wrote, but if you want to see the whole discussion this web page was still accessible on: http://www.bbc.co.uk/cgi-perl/h2/h2.cgi?find=%3C1110369241-4133.12%40forum2.mh.bbc.co.uk%3E#mid There were 10 other contributions besides mine, as given below.  You never know what direction the discussion is going to take.  I'm not the only one with an axe (just one?) to grind (one of the guys has contributed over 10,000 posts to the Radio 5 message board.  Now that's what I call a weakness).  The big advantage this time on the internet is that Adrian has got us Broadband installed at the office in Stockport.

Catholic can't marry Head of State Hugh 2030 - 1st post - 8 Mar 2005 16:52
Edward Leigh is introducing a bill into Parliament today to enable the UK Head of State to marry a Catholic. There is a 300 year law which says that prevents heirs to the throne marrying 'Papists'. They can marry anyone else. Surely today this is a form of discrimination that must be unparalleled in a modern democracy. Edward Leigh is making his 10-minute rule bill as simple as possible to give it some chance of success, though snowflakes in hell come to mind. Have the BBC even mentioned this Bill today? More to the point, why can't Catholics become Head of State in this country. What would our reaction be if we discovered that Spain or Italy had a law that excluded Protestants or Jews or atheists from the highest positions in the land. [reply]    [Complain about this post]
 

re: Catholic can't marry Head of State Hugh 2030 - 2nd post - 8 Mar 2005 17:33
Hugh 2030. What is more important, that the Head of State should be an Anglican or that any citizen should be able to be Head of State, or at least marry into that family. As for Catholics being Archbishop of Canterbury, they use to be all Catholics and might be again [reply]    [Complain about this post]

re: Catholic can't marry Head of State Hugh 2030 - 3rd post - 8 Mar 2005 17:36
Hugh 2030. Camilla was not born a Catholic but her husband was a Catholic. I have even heard it said that he got that marriage annulled, which means ironically that Charles and Camilla would be free to marry in the eyes of the Catholic Church [reply]    [Complain about this post]
  
re: Catholic can't marry Head of State Hugh 2030 - 4th post - 9 Mar 2005 11:14
Ruth, most countries seem to survive without the Head of State being entwined with a state religion. You say 'If someone in the Royal Family currently wants to marry outside CofE, then let 'em give up their position on the civil list.' My point is that they can marry outside the C of E and still keep their position on the civil list, as long as the person they are marrying is not a Catholic. You say that the real issue is the separation of Church and state. Maybe that is what it is going to have to come to if we are to overcome this discrimination against our Catholic citizens. You might not think that is real, but you try telling people that you have just become acquainted with that you are a Catholic and see the reaction. [reply]    [Complain about this post]
 

re: Catholic can't marry Head of State Hugh 2030 - 5th post - 9 Mar 2005 11:54
Ruth, sorry if I was not very clear. I am not pushing for the separation of Church and state in itself, but it might need to come to that if that is the only way to overcome discrimination against Catholics. You say: 'as a Jew I would've had to have my marriage officially recognized by a registry office in addition to a religious ceremony.' I thought all marriages had to be recognised by a registrar, and that ministers of religion can become registrars if they want to, or they can get the local registrar to come along if they want to save themselves a lot of paperwork [reply]    [Complain about this post]

Will I be as excited about starting my rationed web discussion in April.  I doubt it.  The new web page Euan is going to host for us has a community site to which members can contribute.  You've been warned.

`

March 10 - Thursday

ISRAEL

On Sunday Jenny promised to write something on Israel as a way of keeping up interest in a possible visit there.  Here is what she wrote.  If you have any questions or observations we can pass them on to her if you email hugh@project2030.fsnet.co.uk

Israel is a land of opposites: the weather can get to 50 degrees in summer but snow can fall bring the streets of Jerusalem to a standstill in Winter; the land is dry with arid desert in some areas but then vast lush plantations stretch out for miles in others areas; the topography of Israel boasts mountain ranges and the lowest dry place on earth – the shores of the dead sea. The people of Israel can display opposite tendencies too:  The lonely planet guide describes Israeli’s as Cactus - hard and prickly on the outside, but once you know them friends for life.  Judaism is the only religion I know that requires a strict fast where you can not even drive your car for one festival (Yom Kippur) and for another (Purim) you are ordered to get so drunk that you can not distinguish the words 'bless Mordechai' from 'curse Haman' nor walk home.  

I arrived in Jerusalem in August 2000.  I would shop in Bethlehem, spend time with friends in Jericho and queued up for hours to visit various places that Jesus lived and died.  November 2000 saw a start to the violence and life changed considerably.  What is Israel like now?  Well it is still the same beautiful country, people get up, go to work and come home, however with daily bombings the Israeli’s fear for their safety, whilst, with the closure of the west bank areas, Palestinians are being denied access and work in Israel. Both sides of the conflict are suffering. This intifada, for the first time since the state of Israel was declared has also started to divide small local communities where Jews and Arabs live happily in peace. The birth place of John the Baptist and home of Elizabeth on the edge of Jerusalem (Ein-Karem) is just one such example.  

Even though Israel is the size of Wales, you could never visit everything that needed visiting in one trip. Choosing what to do is a tricky business.  You do however need to divulge in all aspects of life there. A major part of any pilgrimage to the Holy land involves following the footsteps of Jesus: visiting several of the hundreds of Churches, meditation on the place where Jesus multiplied the fishes, tasking a boat on the sea of Galilee and walking the Via Delarosa (way of the cross) are all musts. In addition to these, and depending on your budget and time of year the following options are available too:  paragliding off Mount Tabor, scuba diving on the coral reefs in Eilat, crossing the boarder into Egypt and taking a camel ride up Mount Sinai to where the 10 commandments were given to Moses, floating on the dead sea – the lowest place on Earth, white water rafting down the Jordan river, skiing on Mt Herman, climbing the waterfalls at Ein gedi (the cave where David nearly killed and abseiling next to Qumran -  the place where the dead sea scrolls were found.  These activities also allow you to meet and socialise with other Israeli’s and well as explore this amazing and diverse country.

Getting to know Jewish people and their land can deepen our Catholic faith. Learning about the Old Testament through visiting many of the patriarchal tombs certainly enlightens.  I only began to understand the meaning of some of the psalms after standing in the City of David looking down over the valleys of Kidron.  The Jews also take their faith very seriously.  Friday nights in Jerusalem involves getting home as soon as possible before Shabbat kicks in – pubs, clubs and restaurants; except for the few that are willing to pay the Rabbinical fine close down.  Families get together for the traditional Shabbat meal.  The horn sounds and a four thousand year tradition begins.  Not being allowed to work on a Friday / Saturday is actually a blessing. Rather than being bored, people find time for each other, for socialising and for resting before beginning work again on Sunday.   

Should we visit the Holy land?  This is a very difficult question to answer so I will give you some facts.  The British Embassy says NO, so travel insurance will not be valid.  Safety wise – Whilst I was there seven bombs went off within a 2 block radius of the school, a bus on my bus route was bombed, and sleep in my home near Bethlehem was disturbed regularly.  Looking at all this the answer has to be no, however…I never felt scared or fearful for my life.  My parents came and visited as did my sister and her husband whom all had an amazing time.  The secret lies in not going to areas that are potentially hazardous:  Eat meals in the East Jerusalem restaurants – these will not get bombed, do not go on buses, do not travel to certain West bank areas, be sensible.  As a PE teacher I had to take pupils to fixtures ever weekend – we consulted embassies and consulates who told us whether to go or not.  They knew the target areas and we were never affected.  I would personally say that now is an excellent time to go as there are no queues to any of the shrines or churches, tour leaders have a lot more time and hotels and youth hostels are empty. Flights to Israel are also cheap. In the long term I do not see the situation getting any better than it is now.  Many local Israeli and Palestinian people live off tourists so need us.

Since leaving Israel in August 2003 I returned last Christmas and plan to go again next spring bank holiday.  If 2030 do want to plan a trip to the Holy Land in the future I would be very happy to assist and in the mean time answer any additional questions.

Jenny Whelan

New London 20’s member

March 11 - Friday

GLASGOW 30S ASK TO BE PART OF PROJECT 2030

The Glasgow 30s were the first group to call themselves The Thirtysomethings.  We pinched the name off them.  They started independently, just as Project 2030 was beginning.  Great minds.... or maybe synchronicity.  Ailish and Fr Joe sparked the idea off in each other.  Someone had heard that young Catholics in Australia were meeting in pubs for a talk and discussion.  Their first poster round the parishes in Glasgow had "Come and find out what we are up to" and "GSOH required".  Parish priests were ringing up to ask and what it was all about and what did GSOH stand for.  They met on the first Sunday of the month in the side section of a pub and there were regularly 40 - 50 at the talks.  The first time I attended I was impressed by the buzz.  They invited me to come and talk about Project 2030 and since then some of the group attended retreats at Malpas or came with us to Rome, Germany, Iona, etc.  There wasn't the same demand for a full programme of events besides the talks, more like an occasional walk, meal, ceilidh, retreat, etc.  Eventually a monthly faith-sharing group developed as well.

After a while it became more difficult to find a pub that was quiet enough to get the best out of the speaker, and then it was hard to keep up the flow of good speakers.  Fr Joe became a Parish Priest and had other responsibilities.  Other people started to move on to other things.  The first Mondays became centred round following a Maryvale course.  The numbers were going down and the section of the pub was opened up to other drinkers.  For a long time there were discussions about whether the group had run its course.  They decided to ask me to come along to a meeting to see if Project 2030 had anything to offer.  15 turned up this evening.  There was a good discussion about the present situation and then people shared what had brought them along to the group in the first place.  The more we talked the more the energy grew.  People had got a lot out of the group and were still looking for something to bring them together as Catholics in their 30s.  There was the usual kind of spectrum with some more or less interested in the spiritual and social sides.  With the Glasgow 30s it has always been the more serious side that has predominated.  With such a high population of Catholics there has not been the same demand to have other Catholics your own age to socialise with.  The group, like the other 30s in Project 2030, need to face what to do when the average age gets to the 'wrong' side of 40.

I agreed to offer the services of Project 2030 and to get involved with the group.  The office can help with mailings and membership lists if need be.  Someone thought I would take more initiatives, but no, my aim is to get the group to take as much responsibility as possible and to support that.  We decided to hold an information meeting on the last Wednesday in April.  I'll send out a letter to the parishes about it and we'll include the magazines in that mailing.  The meeting was difficult only because of the noise (we were meeting in the usual pub but it was a Friday).  A few of us went to look for another pub where we could hold the Information Meeting.  We found one at the quieter corner of George's Square, one with a room upstairs that is free for groups of more than 20.  The 20s met there a few times early on, but in recent years they have never warmed to my suggestion of meeting in a pub.  The Glasgow 30s can do well.  They have a good tradition behind them, but what impact will they have on the 20s who have a few people waiting to move upstairs.

March 12 - Saturday

TURVEY ABBEY ....AN OASIS OF PEACE

A reflection on the London 20s retreat, 4-6 March 2005 - by Angela Wong Keet

Not having been on a retreat since my school days and not having been to a monastery before, I wasn’t quite sure what l just see what happens. to expect, so I arrived at Turvey Abbey on Friday evening with the thought ‘Here I am Lord’ and I’ll just see what happens.

What did happen was that we each had time with God both on our own  - in the silent times when we each went our own ways for short periods of time - and together through lots of sharing of our thoughts.  I soon discovered that it’s as much about learning from others as well as looking at yourself. There was a mix of the social side and the spiritual side.  For me, this balance was perfect.  I also found it fascinating being shown around the monastery and convent.  We saw the simple but beautiful chapel (where we also joined in some of the community’s prayers and mass on Sunday morning) and the garden where they grow vegetables.  We also saw some of the beautiful pictures hand sewn by the nuns and pots made by the monks - apparently as long as they have a bit of blue, they will sell!  Something about the place and their way of life, instantly made me feel peaceful.

On Saturday afternoon, we had some free time and Father Hugh took the opportunity for a snooze (having been woken up by the cock crowing non stop from about 5 am – Father Hugh and Steve (being the only two men) stayed in separate building to us), Jenny (being energetic) went for a run. The rest of us were somewhere in between and went for a crisp walk.  We got just a little bit further than the crossing the border from Bedfordshire into Buckinghamshire before heading back for a talk by Brother Tom on the Benedictine way of life. Brother Tom’s stories ranged from being highly amusing to extremely moving and spiritual.

The sharing of ideas, experiences and thoughts and feelings was an invaluable part of the weekend.  Being a 20 something catholic you can sometimes feel isolated but it was lovely to know I’m not on my own.  As we had shared some of our innermost thoughts, we ‘bonded’ extremely well.  For me, this was one of the best bits of the weekend and I feel that what made the weekend so special was the members of the London 20s group who were present.

At the end of the weekend, Jenny described Turvey Abbey as an ‘oasis of peace’ which captures it beautifully.

But as Fr Hugh said, it’s not just about the retreat and time away, it’s about taking something away from it and how you take that forward, and we had some quiet time towards the end of the weekend to consider this.  I hope to take some of the peace, calmness and tranquillity and renewed faith in God back to my ‘everyday’ life… ‘Here I am Lord, I come to do your will.’

March 13 - Sunday

GLASGOW 20S RETREAT - THE RAISING OF LAZARUS

Not another Ash Wednesday service.  Could I take copyright out on giving the ashes at other times of the year?  Would we get away with doing it outside of Lent. Does this symbolise something dark in the psyche?  To be honest I'm not sure how people take it, but no-one has objected yet to being reminded about the need for penance, etc.  And I've still got enough ashes to do the London 30s next weekend.  What about Holy Week at Malpas?  No, that would be too much.

It's always interesting to ask people what they consider most important in the Gospels and to see reactions when others come up with something quite different from them.  I asked the group to think what was the most crucial for them in the life of Christ and also something that was important to them even though it could easily get overlooked.  (Imagine you were emerging from the proverbial nuclear bunker and only had one sheet of paper to write down the memory of Jesus).  The main parts that came up were: treat others as you would have them treat you, the Resurrection, God loves everyone, the Crucifixion.  If you believe in me you will live for ever, and the Last Supper.  No Incarnation and Nativity in that list I pointed out.  But people would remember that anyway, was the reply.  Would they?  Only one of the Gospels has Jesus saying at the Last Supper "Do this in memory of me".  If that had been left out....    

The personal favourites that people would like to include in the "one sheet Gospel" include Barabbas (how Jesus took his place as he took our place on the cross), the Good Samaritan, around the Sea of Galilee, Zacchaeus up the tree, the Prodigal Son, the miracles, the lost sheep.

Today's Gospel was the raising of Lazarus, another of these great "you can sit down for this" readings from St John.  Rather than give people a photocopy of it we tried to tease out from the group what people could remember about the story.  The two who had already been to the Saturday Vigil Mass were disqualified from saying anything at first.  It was impressive how much of the story we could piece together.  Then we listened to a reading of the passage and continued to complete the jigsaw from what we remembered. The discussion got quite lively and took on a life of its own - why did Jesus wait before going to Bethany where Lazarus' sisters, Martha and Mary, lived?  They seemed angry with Jesus.  Were they being selfish wanting their brother back?  Lazarus does not speak.  Jesus sighs, weeps.   The idea was to strengthen in us the parts that said most to us.  I wanted people to sit quietly and meditate further on the story and imagine they were really there and see what other aspects their imagination might develop.  Or they could go for a walk and imagine themselves walking with Jesus to Bethany, or Martha and Mary walking to meet Jesus, or Lazarus coming out of the tomb.  Somebody imagined being the messenger, telling Jesus that his friend was sick and then having to tell Martha and Mary that Jesus did not decide to come immediately.  We left the sharing on this till we had heard the Gospel read again during Mass, but strangely, compared to our earlier discussion, hardly anybody said anything.  At the end of the Mass I asked why.  The conclusion was that most did not feel comfortable sharing their thoughts during Mass, even though there had been a powerful exchange earlier.  Mass did not seem to be the right time.  And that's why Jesus did not rush to his friends immediately.  His time had not yet come. 

March 14 - Monday

WORDS OF WISDOM

Someone came across these words of wisdom.  Certain advice is easier to take.  Some advice suits us while other advice challenges us.  Let's be open to the ways God is leading us forward and be open above all to the wisdom of our own hearts.

People are often unreasonable, illogical and self-centred; forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; be kind anyway.

If you are successful you will win some false friends and some true enemies; succeed anyway.  

If you are honest and frank people may cheat you; be honest and frank anyway.

What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; build anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness they may be jealous; be happy anyway.

The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough; give the world the best you've got anyway.

You see in the final analysis, it is between you and God; it was never between you and them anyway.

March 15 - Tuesday

DIOCESES ARE 'LISTENING'.  BEING SINGLE IN THE CHURCH

 Many Dioceses are going through a Listening process at the moment.  Today I was telephoned by the coordinator  in the Shrewsbury Diocese which has been recently 'listening ' on the theme of Marriage and Family Life.  I have sent her some comments.  If there are any thoughts or suggestions you would like me to pass on to her, send them to hugh@project2030.fsnet.co.uk

Thank you for your interest in Project 2030 and what the Church can do for Catholics in their 20s and 30s. I will let people in the Shrewsbury Diocese know about the Listening process that is going on and invite them to send you any ideas. I like the approach of 'Listening'.  Basically, that is what I have tried to do, by getting people together and asking them how Project 2030 can help them. It's easier for me when dealing with a clearer target audience, but I'll presume the next step for the Diocese is how to put recommendations into action, and how you can facilitate what people would like to do.

I have put together a few ideas that I have picked up from the group:

- the Listening process is going on in other Dioceses. Some anger was expressed on one occasion because people who are single felt left out of the question on 'Marriage and Family Life'. It is important that Marriage and family life is promoted by the Church, but if no space has been created for the single person, young and old, in the Listening process, then that needs to be remedied. Your phone call is an indication that you are taking that question seriously.

- in liturgies, prayers and sermons, single people need a mention without being patronised. One third of households in Britain are people living on their own.

- younger single people have often commented that the overage congregation can be seen to be made up of three main categories.

    1)  Children who are brought there by their parents

    2) Parents who are only there to bring the children

    3) Older people who are worried about keeping up their insurance policy.

- Parish councils and other such bodies should regularly invite younger single Catholics to be members to represent their age group, and not be put off if younger people are reluctant to come to the meetings. Two reps would make it easier for them.

- I am always surprised how few of my groups are Eucharistic Ministers. This is likely because they do not go regularly to the same Church (Parish is not so important at that age and could even put some off) or because they are often away at Weekends or come to Project 2030 events, while still attending mass.

This must also be a problem for younger married couples. Is there any way that Parishes could have a group of younger Eucharistic ministers who cover a certain mass but be flexible among themselves who does each Sunday?. This could easily be coordinated between themselves by email and phone. Its important that the younger group see role models of their own age involved in the Liturgy. The same applies to Readers. It tends to be the older parishioners because they can guarantee to come more regularly.

- ask the parishes to promote Project 2030. We have been mailing the Churches for five years and you had never heard of us. Even if there are not many in their 20s and 30s at Mass, parents pass on the information. It has been a way for quite a few to come back to the Church. Older people are happy to know that something is being done for a younger age group, and even if younger people don't get involved in Project 2030 they are happy to know that their own age group is not being left out.  We will send you some material now and put you on the email list and parishes postal list.

March 16 - Wednesday

EVENING CLASSES FOR MEN

Sorry to be so sexist about this.  Maybe someone can work out a similar course for women.  Applications to Catherine R.

NEW EVENING CLASSES FOR MEN!!!

ALL ARE WELCOME

OPEN TO MEN ONLY

Note: due to the complexity and level of difficulty, each course will accept a maximum of eight participants

sign up early and get a discount on registration

The course covers two days, and topics covered in this course include:

DAY ONE

HOW TO FILL ICE CUBE TRAYS

Step by step guide with slide presentation

TOILET ROLLS- DO THEY GROW ON THE HOLDERS?

Roundtable discussion

DIFFERENCES BETWEEN LAUNDRY BASKET & FLOOR

Practicing with hamper (Pictures and graphics)

DISHES & SILVERWARE; DO THEY LEVITATE/FLY TO KITCHEN SINK OR DISHWASHER BY THEMSELVES?

Debate among a panel of experts.

LOSS OF VIRILITY

Losing the remote control to your significant other - Help line and support groups

LEARNING HOW TO FIND THINGS

Starting with looking in the right place instead of turning the house upside down while screaming - Open forum

DAY TWO

EMPTY MILK CARTONS; DO THEY BELONG IN THE FRIDGE OR THE BIN?

Group discussion and role play

HEALTH WATCH; BRINGING HER FLOWERS IS NOT HARMFUL TO YOUR HEALTH

PowerPoint presentation

REAL MEN ASK FOR DIRECTIONS WHEN LOST

Real life testimonial from the one man who did

IS IT GENETICALLY IMPOSSIBLE TO SIT QUIETLY AS SHE PARALLEL PARKS?

Driving simulation

HOW TO BE THE IDEAL SHOPPING COMPANION

Relaxation exercises, meditation and breathing techniques

REMEMBERING IMPORTANT DATES & CALLING WHEN YOU'RE GOING TO BE LATE

Bring your calendar or PDA to class

GETTING OVER IT; LEARNING HOW TO LIVE WITH BEING WRONG ALL THE TIME

Individual counsellors available

March 17 - Thursday

ADVENTURES IN INDIA 2005

This is Catherine's report on the recent visit to India.  The full report will be sent round by email and will be available soon with photographs on the web page (www.project2030.org.uk).  There you can also see Ronan's report from last year.  If you want to go to India next January you need to book up soon.  See main events list for details.

It was still Christmas when Louise, Carmel, Steve and I arrived in Cochin, Kerala on 5 January 2005, and large, colourful, glowing stars were hanging from homes and churches. We were all very excited, as none of us had been to India before. Each of us came from the four corners of London, except for Hans who joined us halfway through and is from central London. Carmel and I knew each other and Hans quite well before the trip, Louise was a relative newcomer, and Steve was a very new member, this being one of his first encounters with Project 2030. Throughout the trip we got to know each other extremely well through many interesting conversations. We all got on well, which was fortunate as we were living at very close quarters.

To our delight, day two was spent lounging around on a riverboat gliding through the backwaters of Cochin.  I could now understand why the locals call Kerala “God’s own country,” as all around us there was nothing but palm trees, paddy fields, and green water. Observing life on dry land was fun, as we passed many schools built at the riverside, people washing clothes, and strolling along the water’s edge. After a delicious lunch, the crew moored the boat and brought us fresh coconuts each. Sucking coconut juice through a straw, straight from the coconut felt like the height of decadence!

We met so many wonderful people in India, but some of the friendliest we met were the boys at Fr Martin’s pre-seminary training centre in Dehon Bhavan. When we arrived, they welcomed us with a song, and we spent some time getting to know them. On the second time we met them, we had Mass in their chapel.

The long journey to the elephant park in G………. was definitely worth it, as we had an excellent guide to introduce us to the elephants (all 63 of them!) They range from 6 years old to their eighties, and each had its’ own personality.

We spent five nights in the mountains, staying at Kottagiri, in a Carmelite house of prayer, which is situated in the middle of miles of tea plantations. Fr Thomas and Fr Hippolitus were our hosts. The change of scene was much needed, and we were all relieved to escape from the heat and bustle to the fresh, tea scented air and serene beauty and peace of nature. There were so many stunning views by day, and at night you could see all the stars without any light pollution. As soon as the sun set, the temperature dropped dramatically, and I had the best five nights sleep in the whole of our stay in India.

The most memorable people and places that we visited in India were the Christian communities. We visited Mother Teresa’s home for abandoned disabled children in Cochin. The Mother Superior showed us round, and we were followed by two children, who were probably about six or seven. The little girl had a skin complaint that made her look as if she had been badly burnt. She had big sad, red-rimmed eyes. Although I tried to be friendly to her, she looked at me warily and would not smile. The little boy was lively and happy, and he was fascinated by Steve’s watch. 

The House of Joy in Kotagiri really lived up to its name. A Polish nun called Sister Agatha runs it, and she is the happiest, most enthusiastic, and lively person that we have ever met! About ten girls in their late teens and early twenties live with her. Most of them are blind, although some have other disabilities. She teaches them to knit clothes and bags, and make jewellery and rosaries, which they sell to support themselves. Most of the girls are very independent, and they all gain important life skills at the House of Joy. Apart from their totally infectious happiness, the thing that we shall remember them for was their exquisite singing. These girls are professionals, without a doubt.

On the second to last day of our time in India, we met the St Vincent de Paul Society (SVP), of which Leenus and his friend Anthony are active members. They took us on a walking tour, introduced us to five families that they are helping, most of which live extremely close to the beach, or actually on it.   Since the first group went to India last year Project 2030 has been helping these poor families as well as the Dehonian Missions.  The profits from the London parties and picnic have given them over £1000.  About 70% of the families are Christian; Hindu families are also helped. In several of the families that we met, the SVP are paying for medication for a family member who has mental health problems, e.g.: dementia and depression. This is critical assistance, because medication is always very expensive; one month’s course often exceeds the family’s entire monthly income by 3 or 4 times.  Meeting families living in such extreme and shocking poverty was hard for us, and as a group we had mixed feelings about it. Steve felt embarrassed that the clothes he stood up in were worth more than the entire yearly income of the families that we met, and he felt that our presence was voyeuristic, especially when we knew that the people would be very poor. However, Hans pointed out that the families were pleased to see us, and that by visiting them we showed that people in the West are interested and do care. The large group of children that followed us around so determinedly and demanded to have their photos taken were most definitely pleased to see us!

As we said goodbye to our guides Leenus and Dennis at the airport, we were all sorry to leave India. It was definitely the trip of a life time; a great opportunity to gain a different perspective on life and a wonderful way to explore and grow in faith. I would love to return, and will certainly always remember the inspiring people that we met.

Catherine Hopkins

London 20s  

March 18 - Friday

GOING TO THE EDGE - FEELING TOPSY-TURVY

At Malpas there used to be an old set of scales on one of the staircases.  Sometimes just for the sheer heaven of it I used to change the weights around to see them tip the other way.  It was very difficult to get them to balance exactly, but when the pressure was the same on both sides they could sit there for ever on the level.  In life we can be too worried about finding the right balance.  We rarely achieve it and whenever we do it could be because nothing is happening, nothing is moving.  We need to take the chance of getting out of kilter.  We need to be prepared to come down on one side or the other.

Fortunately our lives are not just two-dimensional.  There are various levels that prevent us from collapsing.  Our multi-faceted natures stop us from falling too easily.  We can go out on a limb and yet manage to hold steady.  We can push the boat out without sinking.  Yet if we are too greedy the wind will rip the sails or snap the mast and we are left to the mercy of the raging seas (the runner knows that if he pushes himself too far he will do damage to himself that could take weeks to recover).  We've all gone too far at times.  We've seen our breaking point coming and not been able to stop the slip to the bottom.

Yesterday I felt that I had pushed myself too hard.  Sometimes you are not sure if you are tired or just being lazy.  Some things just have to be done.  There is no real option no matter how you are feeling.  For weeks now I've known that getting accommodation in Rome for Leo Dehon's beatification next month was a priority.  We hoped to get in with another younger group, but the Germans were staying in a place that was too expensive, the Spaniards' hotel was full up, etc.  Other religious houses were taken.  On Tuesday I started contacting the likes of the Irish and English Colleges.  I knew they didn't take groups during term or didn't have enough room for 20 of us.  Thursday as a day off is usually quite sacrosanct if I'm at base, but I spent a couple of hours checking 1 and 2 star hotels on the web, emailing them our details.  The amount of time in front of the screen was taxing my computerally-challenged brain.

The car had been in the garage overnight for an MOT and service.  It should be ready by lunch.  When I walked up there in the afternoon I still had to wait an hour and a half.  I had promised a couple that I would visit them at a distance I would not normally volunteer to drive.  As it got later I should have cancelled, but didn't.  This morning I'm still tense from the driving.  Will the Rome accommodation be sorted out before I head for Turvey Abbey and the London 30s retreat?  There is only one positive reply from all the hotels that were emailed yesterday.   A phone call to Rome firms up the booking, but they need an email with an explanation of how to fit 11 females and 7 males into 7 rooms when there are 6 different dates of arrival and departure.  And if someone is in a triple room the first or last night on their own do they need to pay for the whole room, etc, etc.  With ten minutes to go to morning prayer at 8.45 the puzzle looks solved.  I miss prayers, which I only rarely do if I'm heading off that morning (the head is struggling and the solution unravels several times).  At 9.30 the email has still not been sent.  In the next couple of hours I make several phone calls that should have been dealt with earlier in the week (or just ignored?).  Then a dash to catch the train.  We're moving into heart attack country now.  You get yourself into a state which looks as though it could take weeks to work through.  I arrive at Turvey about 4.00 pm.  The others won't be arriving for a few hours.  A walk in the fields usually works wonders, but even prayers with the community does not help to redress the balance.  Only as the group arrives and we set about the evening meal do things begin to turn back to an even keel.  A reasonable night's sleep helps to restore the equilibrium, even though the cock starts crowing at 2.30 am.  Why do we worry that inner peace has been lost for ever when most times we get away with it?  

March 19 - Saturday

THE FEAST OF ST JOSEPH AT TURVEY

At Turvey the programme of the monks and nuns was different  today because it was the Feast of St Joseph.  Someone in the group asked why was St Joseph so special?  I suppose when you live in a monastery and you don't go away to parties or away for the weekend etc, then the highlights of the year will be the high points in the Church's calendar.  I think St Joseph is still a Holyday of Obligation in the Church, though it has never been celebrated as that in England.  As the husband of Mary and father/guardian of Jesus he is seen to have performed a key role.  

At Mass I did not give out the ashes in the spirit of Lent but concentrated in celebrating St Joseph.  Often he has been portrayed as an unreal character, somewhat remote and sugary, holding a lily.  He is a victim of the over-spiritualising of our saints.  In the past this was done to Jesus as well.  People saw him only as the Son of God.  He was remote.  You bowed your head when you mentioned his name.  In fact you likely referred to him by another title like The Sacred Heart.  Today the idea of the Sacred Heart can seem even more remote, yet when people spoke about the Heart of Jesus in previous centuries it was considered shocking.    You don't mean that Jesus had emotions like us, he loved and cried and suffered, etc.  We are now comfortable with the humanity of Jesus.  Sometimes people still only see Mary as a kind of divinity, but we are more accepting of her humanity.  Poor Joseph has still been left in the clouds.  

Yet when you think of what Joseph went through.  He's engaged and discovers that his fiancee is expecting a baby that she says comes from God.  Only after a dream does he accept to marry her.  Conveniently/inconveniently he has to journey to Bethlehem so no one notices the discrepancy in the time of the birth.  Another dream sees him take his family into exile in Egypt.  Today's Gospel tells how Jesus stayed behind in the temple.   Can you imagine what it would be like to lose your 12 year old son for three days.  Who is this kid anyway?

I wrote once to the Society for the Protection of Unborn Children (SPUC) and suggested that they might adopt St Joseph as a patron because of all that he went through as an expectant father.  A few years later SPUC sent out a prayer card with a picture of Joseph on it, but it was very sugary and the prayer had no reference to what he might have gone through in terms of his temptation to abandon the child and his mother.  Joseph, you're the man.

Clare is doing us a report on the weekend.  I left on Saturday afternoon because of the review meetings in the North West on Sunday.

March 20 - Sunday

REVIEW MEETINGS FOR THE NW 20S AND 30S

The North West has a monthly Taize Prayer at Loyola Hall near Warrington.  Sometimes we piggy-back it for a retreat or a Mass.  Today we had our review meetings for the 20s and 30s, one before and one after Mass at 4.00 pm.

Much of the discussion for the 30s centred around the question of age, how to attract more younger 30s, what to do for those who are moving on into their 40s.  The average age at the meeting would be late 30s.  Most of the things that are organised these days are by people at the top end of the age scale.  During the year a few had talked about starting a Fortysomethings.  How to do that?  If we advertise a 40s group very quickly it will attract the almost 50 somethings, and then the younger 40s will feel the gap too much.  This is the dilemma and this is when the older ones realise why the younger 30s do not get involved as much.  We don't want to throw anyone out.  Deep friendships have developed.  Some younger ones enjoy being with the older ones, but in  general there is an acceptance that most people want to hang around with people that are not too much older than them.  I would be reluctant to join a 50 somethings if the average age was nearer 60, and as you get older the age difference means less.

The best thing might be to let the 40 somethings happen gradually without advertising.  A few in their 40s will get together and work out a few things to do and they can always invite the 30s to come along to some of their events.  They are worried about being pensioned off.  My main concern is that the 40s will end up with the best programme and will suck the life blood out of the 30s in the way that some of the 30s groups have attracted people from the 20s and left the younger ones struggling for their identity.

At the 20s meeting the age problem was not so strong, even though the average age was late 20s and there were a few in their early 30s who prefer to stay with the 20s because they feel the age gap is too big if they move into the 30s group, but they have the comfort of knowing they can go there eventually.  The 20s group need to organise their best events just for themselves and pick up what is best in the 30s programme for the joint events.  With the University Leavers coming up in June we need to have some good events for them.  The more I think of it we might need to put on separate events for the early 20s.  That will depend on whether they want do do that.

With both groups it was decided not to have Information Meetings or Newcomers this year but to advertise certain key events in the parishes like the Manchester Weekend and see if more people will get involved that way for there has not been great attendances at Newcomers Meetings in the past couple of years.

March 21 - Monday

WALKING AND THINKING - UNIVERSITY LEAVERS

My days off have been a bit bitty this past month or more and I'm not going to get Thursday off this week with the Malpas Holy Week Gathering, so I took some time out today.  I headed down the A6 into Derbyshire and climbed up the hills to the Pennine Way as it comes down from Kinder Scout.  A three-hour walk, the first like that since the Christmas break.  Usually on my day off I switch totally off work and don't let any thought of the groups get in or out.  Today was different in a good sense.  Maybe I need more quality thinking time or maybe because it was a working day, I found myself wondering what to do if the University Leavers in England gets off to a flying start.  Will they feel too big an age difference with the older 20s?  Will we need to do some events just for them?  And then next year do events for those who had left university in the past 18 months.  How many years will it be before the University leavers don't want anything to do with those who left University 2,3,4 years before?  It definitely is a separate category.  You often get people contacting Project 2030 because they had a good experience at their chaplaincy and they are looking for some continuity.

I was never that convinced of doing a University leavers in the first place.  I mentioned it as a possibility to my support group of Dehonian priests last summer and they were quite enthusiastic about it.  But I was still going to drop it until our Fr General came from Rome and said you must do something for University Leavers.  Now I'm beginning to get a bit excited about it.  Adrian has done an address list of 55 chaplaincies in England and Wales.  Surely from that lot we should get a decent crowd at Malpas in June.  Fortunately I've got a few in their 20s to help me that week, as I know the age gap for me (and them) will be bigger.

People have asked recently: "What about the proposed groups in Belfast, Sheffield, Birmingham?"  They are going to have to wait a while longer.  

March 22 - Tuesday

PENITENTIAL SERVICE - EASTER DUTIES?

This evening we had a penitential Service for the parish with a good attendance.  It's not very often I hear confessions.  That's one reason why I don't think to go to the Sacrament more often.  And maybe why I forgot to offer reconciliation during the group retreats in Lent.  We had the ashes, but it's still important to say aloud those areas of our lives where we need God's forgiveness and support.  God wants us to experience his love and to get a fresh start.  It might be the same kind of things that we have to mention time and time again.  That should not dishearten us.  God knows what we are made of.  He is our Creator.  Going back to confession is a bit like having a repeat prescription.  We might not seem to be getting much better, but if we stop taking the medicine we know we shall soon be much worse.

This was the prayer we said at the  beginning of the service:

Father of mercy, we come together before you with gratitude in our hearts.  Thank you for inviting us, once again, to receive your healing love and forgiveness and the strength and grace to make a new beginning.  Like the prodigal son, we come with sorrow to confess our weakness, our sinfulness, our selfishness and our unwillingness to love you and to love all our sisters and brothers.  

Father, dispel the darkness in our lives and may Christ your Son, our Saviour and Redeemer, be our light this day and every day.  This we ask through the same Christ our Lord.  Amen.

The Church used to speak about Easter Duties whereby we had to go to confession and communion at least once a year.  Now we are only obliged to go to confession if we have committed a grave sin, but we still have to go to communion at least once a year and that would normally be within the seven weeks after Easter.  For most of us that is not a problem as we are happy to go to communion regularly, but for others it is good to have that incentive in case they deprive themselves totally of the Sacrament.

I forgot to switch off my mobile and didn't it go off while someone was baring their soul and me sitting on the High Altar 'in conspectu omnium'.  Almost as bad as the main celebrant who only realised that he had the radio mike still switched on when the first penitent approached him.

March 23 - Wednesday

The Bishops of England and Wales have asked voters to question candidates for the upcoming election on various issues including:  marriage and family, respect for life, criminal justice, education and the global common good (the cancellation of debt, fair trade etc).  This has raised quite a debate and abortion looks as though it could become a serious issue.  This was a letter I sent to the Manchester Evening News today.

It was sad but not surprising to see Jenni Murray (March 22) trying to stifle the new debate on abortion even before it has started. She seems to be defending the termination of pregnancy for a cleft palate at 22 weeks.

She says that women 'do not enter lightly into the destruction of a potential life.'  That's the real question.  Is it just potential or is it a real human life that is perfectly viable if left to mature as nature intended?

She is also inclined to exaggeration.  Abortion is just one of the issues that the Catholic Cardinal suggested that election candidates should be questioned on. 45 per cent of your Readers Poll (March 22) seem to agree with him.  And how can she prove that 'those who coo over the foetus are often remarkably unconcerned about unwanted children once they are born'?

Everyone has sympathy for women who find themselves unintentionally pregnant, though why they had sex in the first place is another matter.  As for leaving it to those who play the game to make the rules, that's a recipe for anarchy.  And that's what's happened in Britain, with one abortion every minute of the working week.

When I checked to see if the email had gone through I discovered a reply from the newspaper which said that the Manchester Evening News was part of the Guardian Media Group.  I should have known.

March 24 - Thursday 

MALPAS: GROWING IN COMMUNITY

The 'Growing in community' weekend brought about 18 of us together at Malpas. This cohort were mostly from the NorthWest, but we did have two from Portugal and two from Canada amongst us!!

The two guys from Portugal, Joaquim and Elder had at Hugh's invitation come to give us the background of Leo Dehon and Dehonian spirituality (both are soon to take their final vows).

The format of the weekend was relaxed with Martin (Glasgow 20s) opening the Saturday morning session with his thoughts and ideas on community. He accompanied this with well chosen prayers, readings and mimicry!.... say no more!

Joaquim then gave a power point presentation on Leo Dehon, however, time was against us and everyone agreed that they would have liked further time to really digest the info. I think some within the group managed to copy CDs of the presentation.

The afternoon break saw some of us going for the traditional Sat afternoon walk, courtesy of Andy, whilst Duncan took our Portugese visitors on a whistle stop tour of the sites/pubs of Chester.

The evening session was devoted to a talk on the Dehonian's missionary work in Madagascar, a brief  'buzzing' session at Hugh's direction and then was rounded off with what was for me very moving taize prayers. Again as is traditional with any 2030 group taize this was followed by a dive into the local pub.

The final session on Sunday saw us split into boys and girls to discuss our ideas, hopes (or even dreams) for our own 2030 community. I think Hugh feared the guys would just end up talking football, and the girls talking ..... but some really positive ideas were broached by the time we were reunited.

As we gathered together for our final mass Hugh had placed on the altar a pile of Dehonian crosses, all on leather straps that were intertwined.  The theme of community, serving one another in the knowledge that we are alive not for ourselves but for each other, was for me summed up when Hugh invited each of us individually to approach and "pick up our own cross"

As always when amongst friends, the weekend passed quickly, and was rounded off with a shared meal before we all scattered.

March 25 - Friday

GOOD FRIDAY - HOLY WEEK AT MALPAS, CHESHIRE

There are over 30 of us at Malpas for our Holy Week/Easter celebrations.  Most of us were here last night for the Holy Thursday Mass.  Usually I'm twisting people's arms (or feet?) to volunteer for the washing of the feet.  This year there are just 2 volunteers, even though I quote what Jesus said to Peter who didn't want the Master to be serving him in this way: "If I do not wash you you can have no share with me".  We wash each other's feet, the three of us.  Having someone else dry my feet is quite ticklish and I have to try hard not to giggle.

After Morning Prayer at 9.30 we briefly introduce ourselves.  A few claim to have met more than half of the group at previous events.  Of those who have arrived already there are 4 from Scotland, 8 from London, and the rest from the North-West and Wales (this is the first year that there is no-one from Ireland).  People say not only where they are from but also other places where they have stayed.  Some people have moved around a lot.  The Scots have moved nowhere, mainly because if Scots go to University they usually go to one they can travel to from home.

We break up into groups to prepare this afternoon's liturgy - everyone has a job, whether in music, readings, the Passion, the long bidding prayers and the Veneration of the Cross.  Some also prepare a service of Stations of the Cross for this evening and tomorrow's morning prayer.  At 11.30 we head off on a walk through the country lanes.  It should only take an hour but we are back late for lunch at 1.00.  By now everyone has arrived.  There are 35 of us, plus Vince and Melissa who are coming in for the services.  A Canadian couple, they just moved into the area recently.  They were in a bad car accident earlier in the week which has left them pretty shocked and sore.  I had sent them an email last week about the idea that came up at the Growing in Community weekend in February of doing something for married couples, but we decided to leave that for now, especially as their laptop has been destroyed in the accident.

It's a pleasant sunny afternoon so most of the afternoon service is done outside.  We gather on the main steps for the readings.  Then the Passion of St John is dramatised in various parts of the garden.  Inevitably a few parts raise a smile but the overall impression is moving.  The long bidding prayers are given additional introductions to make them more real for today, taking into consideration the likes of the reality of the Pope's health or the trials and tribulations of the Jewish people.  Abortion gets mentioned twice as does the tsunami.  

For the Veneration of the Cross we go into the Chapel, where the Taize cross is lying flat, raised off the ground by copies of the Catholic Encyclopedia.  We are invited to follow the Orthodox tradition which is used at Taize to kneel and place our forehead on the cross in a moment of silent prayer.  Quite powerful.

After the service there's a game of football.  For once I decline.  Too much excitement in one day.  Lunch had been just soup and rolls, but the evening meal is three course.

Later we have a meditation on the Cross prepared by some of the group, then a quiz prepared by Gavin.  Two teams draw on 24 out of 30.  No controversy over any of the answers, but when we have an elimination quiz with teams asking all the other tables a question each, people don't believe that the Gospel of John actually mentions the number of fish that were caught when Jesus appears to the Apostles after the Resurrection.  How many fish were there?

March 26 - Saturday

HOLY SATURDAY - VISIT FROM FR MICHAEL - THE VIGIL, WHERE NEXT YEAR?

After Morning Prayer at 9.30 am Fr Michael Walshe, the Provincial Superior for the Sacred Heart Fathers in Britain and Ireland, and who is based at Malpas, came in to say a few words and to welcome everyone on behalf of Fr Chris who was away doing the Scottish Cross Walk to Iona.  Michael spoke of the upcoming beatification of Leo Dehon.  There are almost 30 of the group going to Rome for it on 24 April.  The hotel said they can take some more, so it is still not too late.  Bookings are still coming in.  Only 3 at Malpas this weekend are going to Rome.  It shows how wide and varied the group is.  People expect it to be the same people who go to things all the time, but you never know who is going to turn up.  That's what makes it so interesting.

Fr Michael spoke about dehonian spirituality and explained that he was going to call together people who were interested in exploring it further.  Some who were at the Growing in Community weekend in February are interested in this.  There will be people also from the Sacred Heart parishes and Centres.  There will be different types of approaches depending on people's outlook and age, but all hoping to be helped in their lives by using Leo Dehon's spirituality of love and self-offering.

After Fr Michael left we got into talking about what the group can do to reach out to others, especially those in their early 20s which was my first target group.  People also wanted to know what would happen to them when they got into their 40s.  The overall age at Malpas this weekend must have been 35 at least.  There was no-one under 25.  How comfortable would those in their early 20s, the university leavers for example, be with that kind of gap.  Maybe some year I would need to consider doing Holy Week for the Twentysomethings and finding a place for the 30s to go.  Later I thought that maybe I could get another priest to do the 30s in Malpas, while I did the Holy Week ceremonies for the 20s in somewhere like Wimbledon, and maybe even get something for the 40s in Scotland or Ireland.

People volunteered to prepare various parts of the Easter Vigil for the evening: the fire which was affected by the damp this year, the Easter Garden which was laid out beautifully in front of the Chapel altar, the Readings which people introduced, the bidding prayers, music, etc.  People also volunteered to go shopping for the party in the evening and to prepare the games for the party.

Before lunch people headed out to Chester, to climb a hill or do a more leisurely pub walk.  The Vigil took 2 hours.  Some kept the party going till 5 o' clock, though whether that was GMT or BST they couldn't quite remember.  The party included male v female teams doing pictionary and identifying surprise items in a box.  Though how you can have a ceilidh to Boney M I'll never know.

March 27 - Sunday

EASTER SUNDAY - BODY SNATCHERS - MADNESS AT MASS

With the loss of the hour we had negotiated a later breakfast up till 10.00.  The staff at Malpas are very good to us and help us to feel at home in ways that they couldn't do to regular groups.  People were mostly down for breakfast.  Someone changed his alarm clock the wrong way and almost missed his lunch. 

I created a few gasps by saying publicly that there had been high jinks during the night.  Look out the dining room window to the Lourdes grotto and you will see that body snatchers have been in to take the body away.  I had tried to persuade the people who did the Easter Garden in the Chapel to get up early and drape the grotto/cave where we had buried Jesus on Friday in a white cloth.  When I saw their faces I let them off and did it myself, rolling the 'head cloth' separately as it says in the Gospel.  We didn't have Morning Prayer together, just the chance for people to do quiet Adoration before the Blessed Sacrament from 10.00 to 10.30.

I had primed Cara and Catherine H to sneak out of Mass during the readings and come knocking the window frantically when I stood up for the Gospel, signalling us to come out.  Liam and Andy F were ready to dash outside in response.  We saw them run past the window and across the lawn.  Meanwhile I was scratching my head and muttering away as if I didn't know what was happening. When the four came back to the window to beckon us out I said:  "We might as well go out to humour them".  When we got to the grotto I questioned the culprits about what had happened.  They gave the Easter story, but not necessarily as it's in the Gospel.  No wonder the disciples got their stories in so many different versions.  We read the Gospel of John.  By this time it was spitting.  When I asked if we wanted to stay out longer at the tomb people quickly voted with their feet and headed back to the warmth of the Chapel.

My theme over the weekend had been identification with the Jewish people, identification with Jesus.  St Paul says: "I have been crucified with Christ, and I live now not with my own life but with the life of Christ who lives in me.  The life I now live in this body I live in faith: faith in the Son of God who loved me and who sacrificed himself for my sake"  (Galatians 2: 19-20).  The challenge of Holy Week, the challenge in life, the meaning of our baptism, is to go through death with Jesus, to hang with him on the cross so that we can also rise up with him to the new life.  "My real life is hidden with Christ in God" is another way St Paul puts it, and also "If we have died with him we shall rise with him". 

March 28 - Monday

THE TIMES TRIBUTE TO THE POPE

I'm often critical of the media, but the coverage of the Pope's illness has been amazingly good in the newspapers and the television.  This is what The Times of London said in one of its leading articles today.

A MASS LIKE NO OTHER - The courage, faith and evident suffering of John Paul II

Of all the many Easter Masses conducted in St Peter's Square over the centuries there can have been none quite like the one witnessed in Rome yesterday.  The service was dominated by a man who was only part of it formally for just a few minutes, but whose presence, or lack of it, was the very essence of the occasion.  When John Paul II finally appeared at the window of his private apartment, his courage, determination, and also his evident suffering, were undeniable.  He strained to breathe, struggled to do more than whisper into a microphone and found the smallest gesture of his hands a burden.  Many of the faithful who had come to this service in the hope of seeing him must also have wished, in a sense, that they had not done so.  This was a Mass of the body and blood of Christ but also of widespread tears for the ailing yet heroic Pontiff.

The numbing power of this spectacle is made sharper by memories of the untypical strength that this Pope once brought to his position.  To see a man of such vigour, the first Pontiff to take himself out into every corner of the world, in this condition is especially saddening.  That a Pope who once spoke for millions of the oppressed - and in Eastern Europe was the catalyst for their liberation - is incapable of forming a sentence for himself is a cruel and searing irony.  The Vatican is plainly capable of functioning with its leader in such a distressed state; the Secretary of State, Cardinal Angelo Sodano, undertook the Pontiff''s duties with authority and an admirable calm dignity.  Yet his own deep concern for the Pope was obvious yesterday as well.

This brief appearance will inevitably revive the debate as to whether resignation would be the kindest course of action for John Paul II personally and for the Roman Catholic Church as an institution.  This is immensely sensitive territory.  Voluntary departure from St Peter's is not without precedent, but most of those examples occurred in circumstances that were less than ideal and this has led to a sense within the Church that to leave would be abdication in the worst aspect of that term.  A papal resignation should not, though, be deemed an eternally inappropriate option.  There will be a moment when a Pope believes, after careful prayer and contemplation, that it would be best to spend the last period of his life in a retreat and not the Vatican.

Few conclude that this Pope, although he has produced many surprises before, will set that example.  He considers it his obligation to see through his tenure to the end, even if done at huge mental and physical cost to himself.  If that is his decision, then it should be respected.  He has sacrificed so much for his faith and humanity at large that to preach to him on the wisest meaning of sacrifice would be a disrespectful imposition.  If this is to be his last Easter Mass, and he has defied many similar predictions before, Roman Catholics and many others should remember and treasure the thought of what an astonishing and transformative Pontiff he has been.   

March 29 - Tuesday

EMAILS MAKE THE WORLD GO ROUND?

Today was a day for catching up on emails.  Here are some of the questions that can be arising at any time, to give you an idea of what can be passing through the office at any time.

March 30 - Wednesday

NW 40S BITE THE BULLET?

For some time people in their 40s in the North West Thirtysomethings have been considering setting up a 40s group with a little 'gentle' encouragement from myself.  This is what I wrote to 14 of the stalwarts in response to an email from one of the older ones.  Life begins at....

Thank you for your thoughts on the review meeting and your positive approach to what has been achieved in Project 2030.  As you say, there are good foundations from which to do more for people in their 20s and 30s and 40s.  The irony is that my original target audience of 18-25s hardly appear on the radar.  And my second target audience of early 30s who wanted to come to the 20s at the beginning have also disappeared.  Much of this is due to the way we market ourselves, as the people who identify with being 20 or 30somethings are inevitably going to be more in the upper age bracket.  The 40s have rightly sensed this and letting the 40s evolve more naturally from the 30s is a good idea, because if you did advertise a 40somethings it would quickly become a 50somethings.

You might want to meet on your own first, but I would be happy to be involved.  I certainly don't want to abandon people, especially when I have more personal affinity with those who are nearer to my age.   At the moment I am free on Sunday 8 May.  You are welcome to meet here in Stockport or it could be Loyola or somewhere central. 

We need to decide what is the 40+ group for.  Is it just a group of friends, survivors of the Thirtysomethings, or does it see itself as reaching out to others on the mailing list in their early 40s, trying to bring to others the benefits you have received from the group.  I would prefer the latter.  There are quite a few 40s on the mailing list.  While most people are happy to mix with younger ones there could be some who don't come to things because they would prefer to hang out with others their own age.

I have been thinking about what Fr Michael Walshe said at Malpas on Saturday about the Dehonians' spirituality.  Without making things too spiritual, it could give a focus to the group, especially if I am not going to be able to make it so often to things, though I would enjoy coming along for my own sake as well and want to help in any way possible, including office support. 

Of course not everyone is going to like this idea of letting a 40s grow out of the 30s group.  I'm sending this to quite a few others.   Apologies if I've left anyone obvious off or included anyone who is not nearing 40.  Most people realise that the idea for this 40s group originally comes from me, and most also have come to accept however reluctantly that something like this has to happen if we are to encourage younger 30s to get involved and also to move on from the 20s because they don't at present identify with a 30s group whose average age is nearer 40.  This causes knock-on problems because the younger 20s can feel too big an age gap with the early 30s.

All this does not mean that the 40s will be cut off from the 30s.  The 40s can organise their own programme and invite the 30s to come along if they want to put that in the 30s programme.  Even invite the 20s.  The 30s will inevitably suffer for a while, but will become healthier in the long run.  We might even need to advertise the other groups as early-30s and early-20s to try and redress the balance.

March 31 - Thursday

IS THERE A CATHOLIC SENSE OF HUMOUR?

Off for a few days break for Easter.  Here are a few things that were spotted in a parish magazine.

NOT TOO SERIOUSLY

Proofs about Jesus

Three proofs that Jesus was Puerto Rican -

1. His first name was Jesus.
2. He was bilingual.
3. He was always being harassed by the authorities.

Three proofs that Jesus was black -

1. He called everybody 'brother'.
2. He liked gospel.
3. He couldn't get a fair trial.

Three proofs that Jesus was Italian -

1. He talked with his hands.
2. He had wine with every meal.
3. He worked in the building trade.

Three proofs that Jesus was a Californian -

1. He never cut his hair.
2. He walked around barefoot.
3. He started a new religion.

And now - the most compelling evidence!

Three proofs that Jesus was a woman -

1. He had to feed a crowd, at a moment's notice, when there was no food.
2. He kept trying to get the message across to a bunch of men who just didn't get it.
3. Even when he was dead, he had to get up because there was more work for him to do.

Musings on daily life

A day without sunshine is like, well, night.

I have kleptomania, but when it gets bad, I take something for it.

Not afraid of heights - afraid of widths.

I plan on living forever.  So far, so good.

I am having an out of money experience.

My inferiority complex is not as good as yours.

I don't get even, I get odder.

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